As many of you know, I am a frequent poster on RSD Nation, which is Tyler Durden’s forum for aspiring pickup artists: I love posting about how the spiritual tools I talk about here can help guys be better with women. This is not spiritual mumbo jumbo. I’m a pragmatist and only recommend things if I know from personal experience that they will help people in real life. A number of guys over there have told me that my advice is helping them get the girl :-)

One of my blog readers submitted this question:

“I just wanted to say, its been so awesome having those small and brief connections with you. I’m glad someone made me come over to RSD nation!

“Like I said before, I love your blog! That kind of mindset is something that I’m looking for as well.”

[Nice work buttering me up by the way. ;-) Thanks for the appreciation.]

“So this is what I’m wondering.

“With RSD Nation. I’m sure that not all comments to you or about you have been good.

“I’m just wondering what kind of things you use or mindframe that you are in to detach from outcome and detach from what other people think about you?”

Thanks for a great question. You are absolutely right. RSD Nation has 1300 guys on the forum at any given time, and I am the only girl who currently posts on a regular basis. Especially at the beginning, I received a LOT of comments that weren’t exactly … flattering.

Lol :-) That would be an understatement.

Your question is a great one because being unreactive to what other people may think of you is so key to living a full and limitless life.


The Short Answer

The short answer to your question is that I transformed my world view to this:

“I’m going to show you a technology today which takes insults and criticisms out of the airwaves. (Marshall Rosenberg puts on giraffe ears) With this technology, it will be impossible for you to hear criticisms, harsh remarks, or insults. All you can hear is what all people are ever saying, ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’

“What used to sound like criticism, judgment, or blame, you will see, are really tragic, suicidal expressions of ‘please.'”

– Marshall Rosenberg, The Basics of Nonviolent Communication

“There is but one interpretation of motivation that makes any sense. … Every loving thought is true. Everything else is an appeal for healing and help, regardless of the form it takes.”

– A Course in Miracles

“Every action is either an expression of love or a call for love. Reframe all aberrant behavior as a call for love, and you will have the key to healing. You will know what to do for yourself and you will know what to do for others.”

-Alan Cohen

“You do not need to prove your worth to anyone. You just need to know it.

-Alan Cohen


The Longer Answer

I’m too tuckered out at the moment to give the longer answer but will circle back again when the energy moves back in this direction.