So here we have another natural whose secrets will be revealed. He showed up out of the blue and took me out last night. I asked him if it was ok to call him “Ferrari Guy” on my blog, and he said no problem, so here goes:
I met Ferrari Guy (FG for short) a little over a year and a half ago at a ski resort. We have overlapping social circles. Actually, it’s nearly impossible not to have overlapping social circles with FG because he knows EVERYONE. It does not matter where he goes out, anywhere from Lake Tahoe to Sacramento to San Francisco, and anywhere in between, we ALWAYS run into at least one person he knows and usually a whole crowd. He is a connector. And connectors, I’m sure you’ve noticed, are usually very good with women.
When FG and I met, I was casually dating another guy in our overlapping social circle. No matter. We met briefly at a party, and then the next day I saw him sitting at a table putting on his ski boots, and something drew me to strike up a conversation with him. We immediately discovered that we knew someone in common, which creates instant comfort and social proof with a girl. And there was chemistry.
There was so much chemistry, in fact, that a couple of weekends later, while I’m still dating the other guy, a very funny thing happened. One of my girlfriends, who happens to have a psychic streak, saw all of us interacting and predicted: “Yes, I know you’re dating X now, but in a few weeks you’ll be dating FG.” I just laughed.
Maybe two weeks later, X and I called it quits, I went out for apres ski without a date, and guess who shows up, completely out of nowhere? FG. Of course. And yes, we did start dating for a little while. Ever since, he and I have had an uncanny telepathic connection and pretty much whenever I think of him, either he texts me or he turns out to be sitting or skiing within 20 feet of me.
So here’s the thing about FG: he has had sex with hundreds upon hundreds of women. He’s been a natural since college, when women first started having sex with him on the first date on a regular basis. He can close a girl in two hours or less. He has women all over him, constantly.
Most recently, he had a mini-relationship with a 20-year old hottie. She was the initiator and made all the moves.
What are FG’s secrets?
1. Being a connector. FG is friendly with virtually everyone. He has a social network numbering in the many thousands of people. He meets new people everywhere he goes, so he is constantly meeting women. Every year he throws a huge fundraiser that draws a crowd of 500 or 600 people. This also provides “social proof” of course.
2. Attractive lifestyle. FG has a nice house, is a successful entrepreneur, has developed the spiritual side of himself, is socially connected (see above). He is an amazing skier. He drinks nice wine. He’s chivalrous. And, yes, he does have a Ferrari, but he’s not over the top about it (which would be a turn-off).
3. Unreactive. FG rolls with life. He has no interest in marriage or having children, and he is willing to let women come and go from his life without any stress about it whatsoever. He is one of the least reactive people I’ve ever met. If a girl he’s seeing gets in a relationship with someone else, his attitude is “no worries, I don’t mind being your backup plan.” The attitude with which he’s saying this though is with a sly wink. He sees boyfriends come and go, and women always come back to him.
4. Sexual confidence. I haven’t had sex with FG. His attitude about this is very attractive though. He once said to me, “it’ll happen sooner or later, at some point you’ll be ready to fuck me, and I’m not worried about when.” That’s his frame, and he holds it steadily and unreactively, and it works. Even women who resist him for quite a while eventually surrender. Part of why I feel so comfortable with him is I know he’s going to get his sexual needs met, he doesn’t need anything from me.
5. Centered masculine presence. When I’m with FG, I enjoy nestling up to his shoulder, it feels comfortable being physically intimate with him. I love that he is chivalrous without any attachment to the outcome. Basically, I feel very accepted around him. He isn’t swayed by other people’s judgments, either. That kind of steadiness feels very safe to me. When I contact him, I know I’ll hear back from him. No game playing. No ego.
6. Sense of humor. We always have a playful, fun time and laugh a lot.
7. Devout resistance to commitment. FG kind of reminds me of Hugh Hefner, who apparently said he can’t handle one woman. Four or five, yes, but one is too much. FG is a man of the people. He loves everyone. He has no interest in “settling down,” getting married, or having kids. And while that may be frustrating for the woman who is trying to pin a man down, I love it because I can always count on FG. He was dating a woman for about eight months recently, and I asked him whether he was in love, and he said “I’m still single. I’m not in love with any one woman exclusively.” I love that attitude because he values ALL of his relationships with women, he doesn’t allow one relationship to become so prominent that it starts detracting from his other relationships.
8. Calibration/Social Intuition. FG told me a story last night of how he got one girl who had resisted him for a long time to have sex with him. He used basic reverse psychology and said he wasn’t interested in having sex with her anymore. Then she had to have it. “You know that would never work on me, though, huh?” I said. “Yep, that’s why I’ve never done it with you.” Lol :-)
What I can see in these articles is not so much the success of the various males, but your own wonderful presence.
Awwww thank you Meir, that felt so beautiful to hear. Yes, that feels true, I was bringing a lot of presence to these connections. And that did help make them magical. Takes two to tango :)
Ferrari Guy and I will be in the same ski house this winter, so this story may be continued …
;-)
Ah the fun of the unknown.
Try out my advice and walk into Ferrari dude’s room with nothing on but a red bow. You might be pleasantly surprised at how it goes.
I cannot tell you how much I LOVE this stuff.
You rock girl!
HAF
Yeah, I use the term “game” because this community knows what it means, but ultimately the guys I most enjoy spending time with are the ones who aren’t “gaming” me at all. There’s just a naturally very high level of attraction and fun.
Ryan from RSD wrote a really nice article about the issue of overgaming: http://www.ryanforreal.com/?p=32.
I love it. I’m not just saying that. He seems like an amazing guy. That’s the kind of guy I aspire to be — well connected and successful, but with no attachment or identification with it, so it just comes off as icing on the cake that is me, my presence. It’s great to have a reminder of how a man who “has it all” would behave. On his own terms. Fantastic post…
I like what LP said.
The guy sounds cool.
A connector is a value giver of the highest degree. These are the guys who can throw ridiculously good parties.
I also try not to think of social dynamics as ‘game’ because it’s like a ladder to climb, when in reality, it’s about letting go of it all together. That’s just me though. That way I can say, ‘I don’t even NEED game and I still get girls wanting my ass’ *shrug* coz all I’m being is myself.
Being what you call a “connecter” is much more important than getting laid. Sounds like a really cool guy. And I laughed at the part where you said he’s not being over-the-top driving a Ferrari. (Or something.) Personally I don’t think any of that is “game.” I don’t actually like that term. By sound of it he’s a successful and cool guy. Which includes some “game” I suppose. Being good with women is a side affect of being good at life.
I love how honest girls can sometimes be when it comes to “here’s how to seduce me (and yes I wanna be seduced).”
What do I think of FG's game…
-Obviously the guy lives in true abundance and his mentality fits it as a whole.
-His game reflects his life & the way he's in it: abundant, healthy, wealthy, and loving.
I totally respect this way of building his life; very impressed and love success-stories like this.
Not too interesting though to be honest. I'm sure his "game" is great; which I'm not debating what so ever.
I thought burningman-dude was way awesomer; he had man-game. FG has old-man-game…
There's something about old men with game that creeps me out, and I don't know why because I hope to be one someday haha,
But I can't be sure; it's just what I get from the words you've written…
The vibe I get overall though:
FG is a lifestyle-built kinda guy. Very solid. Probably solidified upto a point that he knows so many people that even though if he might loose his wealth he still has many many friends and lives a totally happy life..
On the other side I can see how Burning-man-dude with from what I get has a lot less money; but has a stronger reality that's a lot more internally validated. More of a "wondering nomad" guy; which I just personnally think is cooler and qualitative hahahaha
I don't know what it's like to be a girl; but I can imagine that FG is sort of a "trophy-man"; wealthy, centered, abundant, very connected, etc.
A guy all other women would be jealous of.
If FG was a girl he would be a 33 year old Milf without kids, rich, sweet, etc. haha
(Fully matured, experienced, beautiful, etc)
Personally I'd love a sugah-momma like that; I guess it's the ol' "Mr Big from sex in the city" vs. "Guy from Shoot-em-Up"/ "Zorro" dillema hahaha.
Nice conquest ;)
-Caveman86