Lol, I’m having a very humorous realization right now.

First of all, I woke up feeling downright cheerful. I had also received a large number of encouraging messages and posts on Facebook overnight, so that bolstered my good mood.

And now I’m sitting here in wonderment, very shortly to begin a call with a client, and wondering when my ego is ever going to let up.

We all have ego still, but in working with clients and myself, I notice it comes up for different people in different places in their lives. Most areas of my life run rather smoothly, with very little egoic attachment, and even my dating life runs smoothly. The sticking point has been getting deeply intimate with a particular partner.

I’m seriously starting to wonder if any guy is going to be able to get under my ego’s radar screen. Entropy almost did it. He managed to get very deep in to my emotional centers before my defenses went up. (It’s funny how I don’t feel any anger with him at all anymore — I feel puzzlement with my ego instead.) He was very good at not triggering fear in me for many months. But then the wall of fear went back up, and I’m really wondering if anyone can help me bring it down.

Even this morning, as I started to feel really good and optimistic, at exactly the moment of bliss and thinking “everything’s working out for me just great” … that’s when I noticed the fear creep in again.

I’ve been intrigued by this question for several years now … how do we work with our fear, which is at the root of every problem any of us has? This has become my life’s work.