Our Stories Make Us Miserable: Who Would You Be Without Your Story?
Simplify Your Life in 30 Days with EFT TappingThis is my office today, at Desa Seni yoga retreat by the beautiful swimming pool in Canggu, Bali. The only things on my schedule today are an acupuncture appointment at 1 pm and possibly a Tantric Yoga class at 4 pm. I’ll see how I feel when the time comes. This is life without a story. And I want to share with you how different my life was when I had a story.
Some years ago, while I was suffering chronic pain that was rapidly taking over my entire body, I went to see a doctor. At the time, I was working for a large “prestigious” law firm in San Francisco and I was working an insane number of hours per week. I was also in a long-term relationship with a man who had five children and lived an hour away. We had a “great and very exciting” sex life. My entire life was “go, go, go, go.” Busy all the time. I had not yet discovered meditation, yoga, tapping, or anything else that I now teach.
So from the outside, my life looked “perfect.” I was making a high salary working at a “prestigious” job on the fast track to success. I was dating a wealthy man who wanted to marry me, and we were traveling all over the world on exotic vacations. He would send me huge bouquets of flowers for special occasions and take me shopping and drop $10,000 on gifts for me without a moment’s hesitation. I was riding in limousines and constantly being wined and dined at the finest and most expensive restaurants, drinking $500 a bottle wine. I was wearing designer clothes and shoes, living in the same gorgeous San Francisco “penthouse” that I still have now, and generally “living like the beautiful people.”
Simplify Your Life in 30 Days with EFT TappingAnd I had chronic debilitating pain at a very young age. My shoulders, my back, my wrists, my knees, all wracked with pain. I didn’t understand at that time that chronic pain is a message, it is telling us quite clearly that our life is out of alignment. I was doing everything that society said I “should” do … and having a high level of “success” … so why would I think there was a “problem”?
When I went to see this particular doctor about the chronic pain, there was nothing they could do for me. They gave me painkillers that did not kill the pain. And I started getting massages that would provide some temporary relief.
I remember one woman at the doctor’s office said to me quite bluntly: “You need to stop working so hard.”
Well, I scoffed at this advice. You see, I was stuck in my story. “Stop working so hard? Surely you jest. Clearly YOU don’t understand MY reality.” That’s what I was thinking to myself.
At that time, it was unimaginable to me that one day I would be sitting by a beautiful peaceful swimming pool in Canggu, Bali, writing and teaching for a living. I thought I had to play by “their rules.” So when she said I had to stop working so hard, all I could see was the “disapproval” of the partners at the law firm. The dissolution of the “fast track dream” that I had worked so hard to create. All I could see was “loss of prestige and respect” among my peers. I was totally stuck in my story, and my story was slowly killing my body.
It was not so long after that I was introduced to The Work by Byron Katie. Ego consciousness was so strong for me at the time that the Work didn’t really work for me. I needed more powerful tools. Still, Byron Katie’s book at least opened a window to the possibility of the question:
“Who Would You Be Without Your Story?”
Who would you be without this limiting belief in _____________? Who would you be without the belief that you “need” the crappy job you go to every day? Who would you be without the belief that you “need” a romantic relationship? Who would you be without your “identity” as a hero or a martyr or a victim or a conqueror? Who would you be if you no longer identified with your “age” or your “generation” or your “ethnic heritage” or your “religion”? Without all that … who would you be?
Now I can see lots of other stories at play in my life, and I am slowly stepping aside from all of them …
Without my “story” about what it means to have a “prestigious successful job” … I can now travel all over the world and bring my office with me wherever I go … and my chronic pain is almost completely gone …
This Mark Manson Dishonesty in Dating and Attracting Women … I don’t need this anymore … I’m stepping out of it …
This “story” about chronic kidney disease in cats is lame … If I buy the “story,” then I have to live the crappy high maintenance depressing life that goes with it … I’d rather not buy the story. I choose to believe that kidneys can fully heal and be restored to etheric perfection. I choose for miracles to replace all grievances.
This “story” that all things eventually die is lame … I don’t want this anymore … I don’t believe that God wants this for his beloved children. “God made not death.” To the “only inevitable things are death and taxes” story … I simply say “no thank you.” I remain as God created me.
Simplify Your Life in 30 Days with EFT Tapping My “video studio” in Ubud at the Four Seasons Sayan hotelSo that’s my question for you today: Where in your life are your stories limiting your choices, keeping you stuck in an identity that is not serving you, and generally making you miserable? What if you could simply make a decision, right now, to step aside from those stories and live in the eternal NOW.
“I have invented the world I see. I made up the prison in which I see myself.”
“I am not the victim of the world I see.”
“How can I be the victim of a world that can be completely undone if I so choose? My chains are loosened. I can drop them off merely by desiring to do so. The prison door is open. I can leave simply by walking out. Nothing holds me in this world. Only my wish to stay keeps me a prisoner. I would give up my insane wishes and walk into the sunlight at last.”
– A Course in Miracles
That’s my invitation to all of you today … I invite you to look at the stories that are playing out in your life … both “good” and “bad” … and to consider relinquishing them in favor of living without a story in the eternal now …
My coaching method Holistic Belief Reprogramming is all about unwinding our stories. And right now, I’m recording a Simplify Your Life in 30 Days with EFT Tapping that is particularly focused on making life easier and quieter and more simple, day by day. The 30-Day Simplify Your Life Challenge will offer you at least 30 EFT tapping videos designed to simplify your finances, your daily routines, your relationships with others, your relationship with yourself, and your health. You can tap along with these Emotional Freedom Technique videos from the comfort of your home, and experience profound shifts in how you are living and feeling. In parallel, I am offering on the blog an exploration of a number of practices that will help you simplify your life and become FAR more present to the now, including What Is Yin Yoga? and massage.
The 30-Day Simplify Your Life Challenge is still available now at the pre-sale price. It will be going up to $847 this Thursday, September 19. So get it now and join me in unraveling your stories so that you can have peace.
Behind every worthless story and false identity that we have taken on in this world is our only true desire, for healing and for peace. “I want the peace of God.” Say this and mean it, and all your problems are instantly solved. Join us now here to Simplify Your Life in 30 Days with EFT Tapping.
Erika Awakening, High Priestess of Miracles at TAPsmarter