I may be able to help you with some resources in Japan. If you’d like, please email me coachdj@gmail.com.

Yoroshiku onegaishimasu,
DJ

He’s coming from a model of building social value… i.e., being as “cool” as possible to a girl. This is what most classic PUA revolves around.

But the attraction built from a genuine connection with a girl dwarfs any superficial social value you could provide her.

He’s incredibly mislead, and probably has a bunch of boring one night stands. Email me if you want a more specific answer.

Great comments! I am wanting to respond to all of them and will need to find a bit of time.

For now, Hikaru, you asked about Reiki. I learned it from a very accomplished healer here in the Bay Area. Her name is Jeanine(www.lightenyourway.com). Her talents go way beyond Reiki to other forms of energy healing. She works amazingly well over the telephone, so she can help people all over the world. I worked with her for about six months before ever meeting her in person.

Love,
Erika

The story I was discussing with my instructor involved my journey out of a self created anti-social nightmare. I continued with my dreams to master both NLP and some form of spiritual healing so I can confidently step into that darkness and guide people out.

Now, and I’d like a girls opinion on this ;) My instructor was saying that this kind of story causes a temporary emotional connection but the “DLV” nature of it causes a long term drop of attraction. My view point was that this kind of story really shows why I act the way I do and shows a vulnerable human side.

Love the blog btw hun. Keep up the good work!

BTW where did you learn reiki? I live in Japan right now and I’m quite curious about serious study once I finish university here.

His journey, as he describes it, took him through stages of intense $@*&ing into stages of becoming so good at the art of pickup that he is now the number 2 dating coach. He loves his lovers, his lifestyle and the "harem" he's fostered around him.

Ok… got me… I'm triggered!

I can certainly relate to the intensity of devastation following unexpected loss. I've been there a **few** times and once, I became so completely pissed, I found my own version of creating a harem… or a himem… :) and I blew out tons of sexual energy, worked a meditation practice like crazy, volunteered in service to support transformational work in large groups, and with that stream of men who came through my life in that year, I was blessed to hear over and over and over how beautiful and sexy I am… until some deeper part of me finally heard it… and could let go of that particular aspect of being the "wild child". One day, I just knew, that was the end of that manifestation of that cycle.

Today, I struggle a bit with finding the true calm after that year of storm. I struggle with the number of people whose lives I touched during that year as a cross between wounded female, sexual healer, child of God, lost soul, sexual powerhouse, innocent being, angry vixen. I struggled with the relationships I've had since that year.

I did have the realization, Erika, that God's love is completely unconditional during that year.

And even though I've had that realization, the core hurt hasn't gone away. I realize for me… and this is just where I am still at today, the ways in which I desire to be understood, and to understand, to love and be loved, matched, an inspiration and sacred friend, to reach the arena of mutual devoted love, none of that has faded away… not that it is supposed to… of course…

I do see more clearly that I have attracted by way of my most recent boyfriends, men who are deeply hurting still about some rejection by at least one woman in his life. I discovered I'd been "cheated on".

Zan makes a distinction that I'm so grateful to him for making on his website about men who have wounds of rejection by women… and, what he considers himself to be… a man who is deeply inspired by the beauty in all women. Perhaps he had to go through A to get to Z. ?

The beauty we see in others is perhaps the beauty we can see in everything, *everything*, we've touched, experienced, been hurt by, loved, lost, hated, forgiven, you name it… perhaps this is where the illusion of love begins to reveal itself and real love begins to peek through… I'm not just talking about what is sexy… seeing beauty is very sexy… I'm reaching here for the deeper seduction towards shedding habits of hating the painful encounters to resting in all that has been as the beauty of "resting in growth, development and unfoldment", "resting in the Lord" as Dr Rev Micheal Beckwith would say.

It's so not an accident I've drawn two men in the last two years as lovers who had/have unfinished healing to do with women they were married to, etc, before they met me. It's all pointing to the humbling fact that I'm still carrying a chip on my shoulder about men…

I'm startled to actually begin to see the cultural cycle that gets kicked off in relationships that don't go as hoped for or as planned. I made a comment a while back that once we understand the role of healing trauma while in a relationship, the world will truly know love. Of course, as love would have it, the day after, a book jumped off the shelf at me called Trauma and Recovery. How awesome is that?!

I'm a geek when it comes to stories of completely experiencing peace and love again by becoming free of the pain of lost love! Stories of healing our insides from losses that overwhelm all our best intentions, spiritual practices and available footholds are my equivalent to the most prized, most sacred treasure house! If a man wanted to bring me the ultimate pleasure, I can think of no greater way to do so than to take me by the hand, with complete trust in me and being completely trustable, begin an adventure to experience first hand the most authentic and profound levels of healing the hearts and lives of many, many, many, many, many, many people… To me, that would lead me to the depth of openness that is beyond the beyond… sexy times a million!

Thanks, Erika! You do inspire me to *reveal* myself!

I want to see a simultaneous Lay Report!

Written from your and Entropy’s perspective. I enjoy reading both of your blogs equally. I think it’s awesome that you were able to have such a great experience, and it would be very interesting to see how a community savvy woman such as yourself describes the attraction to seduction in detail – don’t neglect graphic details ;). JK.

p.s. I’m leaving a similar post on Entropy’s blog.

-Javi

First:

“I’ve never met a celibate girl, especially one so overtly sexual.”

Then:

“But this is the thing.”

All right, I can dig it. This can have a lot of us for online dating, which is something I’m doing these days.

As for the fanboydom comment, you have to remember you’re reading a woman’s blog. She has crushes on every guy she writes about, so of course it’s going to come across as “fanboyish” to a guy.